Let’s talk about lies today. Let’s talk about you lying. As I already told you, it’s always about you.

The mankind is born to lie. The studies show the children start doing this at age of 3. They do it at the beginning to avoid punishment, to get more sweets, to eat less and have more fun time. They later lie about homework, about marks maybe and most possible about conflicts at school. The grown ups will lie about themselves, about their weight, age, past relationships and the list can continue.

Is lying good for me?

Could be, in some cases. Let’s explore a bit about them.

Small lies can be healthy in some cases. When your partner asks you if he/she looks good, you should say “yes”. Especially if there is no time to change. You can also lie to someone if it is for their interests at heart. I am not talking about selfish lies at all. A small lie can make your partner confident before an interview, for example. Tell her/him “you are so well prepared and you look so good today”. It will boost his/her self esteem.

You can use also lies at work; don’t tell your colleague he’s not performing, just say “I know you have a hard time, you will surely improve”. This kind of lie might actually help.

Anyway, do not lie to someone close to you, those ones are the ones who rely on you and you should find a way to tell the truth.

Is lying bad for me?

For sure. Let’s detail a bit.

Lying can be damaging. It destroys the trust. Doesn’t matter if it is about a friend, a colleague or your life partner.

When you lie you for sure create a barrier. Never bet he/she will not find out. Unfortunately, when the other person finds out about your lying, and they usually do, it’s almost impossible to regain trust.

When you lie, you have to carry it with you. The more you lie, more lies you need not to get caught. Is like a snowball rolling down.

Lying is a serious drug, it makes you feel good at the beginning and can destroy you later. It destroys friendships and relationships. And most of it, it destroys you!

Lying and relationships

Lying destroys intimacy. Don’t consider “naked” only at the physical level, it is much more. The intimacy is also based on trust and authenticity. A simple lie can change 100 good emotion to bad.

Lying makes you feel guilty and we are built to avoid such moments. This is why for each lie you will find bad things about the other one. This is, again, something that breaks bridges.

A lot of people will say “it’s only once, a special occasion”. In fact this will not happen. The second time you need to lie, it goes really much easier, as you’ve been there before.

Is lying the same as cheating? It is, you’re cheating on you!

Lying comes with a huge cost: it destroys lives. Relationships will crumble and people will refuse to trust you. But the person most hurt by your lying is you. It’s time to make a decision to never let lies have any part of our lives. Are you up for it? Are you ready to look intro the mirror and say “I lied and this is not good”? What you’re gonna do about it?